if i started believing you

if i started believing you
then one day
i would think
that i was the devil
who tried to corrupt
your little mind.

if i started believing you
then one day
i would realize
that i was the witch
who had bewitched
you to sin.

you want to paint the picture
of the little boy lost.
you like to think
you were better than most

if i started believing you
then one day
i would look back for sure
and see that you were the savior
that i was waiting for.

but you were such a little lying creep
you try to blame me everything
even in your sleep.
you cannot take care of your little bitsy self
and now you blame me but
also ask for my help.

Disappointed

i am a tad disappointed. finally, i saw your wife. not that it should be anything to me, but i really found it disappointing to find out, she's normal. Well, it's my fault. I have concluded in my head that you should have married someone
a) drop dead gorgeous
b) intellectual
c) artistic
d) or a combination of all of the above.
so don't be surprised that i am somehow shocked with her mediocrity. Ok... maybe she's great. maybe she is really a rocket scientist just have a tendency to smile stupidly in front of the camera. and i'm not doing women's lib a great favor berating another women but pardon me, women scorned tends to be judgmental. and maybe, just maybe, i still feel like a woman scorned.

so what if it has been nine years and a couple or more relationships after. and you turning into mr. nice guy on me with picket fences and 1.5 children and dogs? well, maybe you have always been these things or what these things are like when they are in their 20's but... i thought...

well, shit i think a lot. maybe that was the problem.